Lone Reflections

Good to be back pt2

2011-10-10T00:36:00.004+08:00

Perhaps to explain more about it to myself since I'll be the only one reading this anyway..

The problem with me is that I don't know who John is.. I just don't know..

I know who God is, I know who Jesus is, but I just don't know who am I.

Like someone who is emotionally disabled, emotionally bipolar.. So dependent upon the praises and affirmations of others that I'll do almost anything to get it..

I crave being significant, I crave being acknowledged... I crave being the golden boy, one which people look up to..

The problem is that i know its not fair.. its not fair to others... how can i expect others to be so generous with their attention for me all the time?

it's like, it is really not possible at all.. i really look up to this mentor really really alot, and in the past, i can always call or sms and "mentor" will always reply... recently i guess i just need to grow up.. to be independent and to live on my own.. part of me really want to grow up, but part of me really still wants to be "pampered" all the time...

it's a paradox isn't it? i want to learn to be emotionally mature, yet i still want ppl to assure and affirm me for it, yet i still crave, really desperately crave for attention... (strange right, that i'm typing on this blog which no one reads except myself....)

the last thing i wanna do is to just blame it that "oh, i'm an only child, its my right to be like that".... Thats pure bullshit..

i wanna be emotionally strong and independent, but God it's just so hard to do... just just just so hard...

i guess everyone struggles with different problems, and this is my achellies heel (yes i know i spell it wrong)

God please help... please!!

interesting isn't it... everything i'm saying here in this post, is so aptly reflected in all the childish nonsense posted since the start of this blog till now... lol...

It's nice to be back

2011-10-09T23:10:00.002+08:00

It's good to be back..

It's been like 3 years..

I now know for sure with the advent of social networking sites, no one will ever read this blog again..

Basically, I would say that my life so far has improved somewhat, God really has been at work in my life..

But the main problem is that everything that affected me in the past, is still affecting me now.. The loneliness, pain, insecurities, seeking of attention.. Everything sometimes just makes it so hard to go on.. Life sometimes seems so stifling and hard to swallow... Sighs

The problem is, there is really no one I have who can really be a listening ear. Though I have some very close relations, but hey, there is a limit right? They also not my gfor my wife... If keep calling them, then end up just completely imposing on them..

Sighs.. Sometimes really so lonely.. Really no one to talk... No one to pour my heart out to,,

Really.. God help!!!!

I get knocked down.....

2008-09-15T23:17:00.005+08:00

Right now, i dunno wad am i supposed to feel.... I dunno how am I supposed to react....
I'm never giving up..... all the things said will only fuel and stoke my fire to improve....
I guess it can be all in this song....
I will be an overcomer.... a conqueror... King over my shortcomings... Just wait and see....

Tubthumping by Chumbawamba

(We'll be singing, when we're winning, we'll be singing)

I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down (x4)

(Pissing the night away, pissing the night away)
He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink
He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink
He sings the songs that remind him of the good times
He sings the songs that remind him of the better times
(Oh Danny Boy, Danny Boy, Danny Boy)

I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down (x4)

(Pissing the night away, pissing the night away)
He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink
He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink
He sings the songs that remind him of the good times
He sings the songs that remind him of the better times
(Don't cry for me, next door neighbour)

II get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down (x4)

I get knocked down, (we'll be singing) but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down (when we're winning)
I get knocked down, (we'll be singing) but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down (ooh)

Sianz.....

2008-09-10T22:07:00.007+08:00

Ok ppl.... Day 3 of my 5 day MC....
Shadow
Honestly, its boring as HELL..... normally, i'll be outside taking a walk.... yes yes.... i know when you are on MC you are not allowed to leave the house.... but hey, don't tell me you haven't bent the rules before..... but then this injury restricts my movement completely.... even walking is a chore now.... haha.....
Sparrows

I was so bored i started watch all my old VCDs.... can you believe it??? in the age of supersized DVDs, i'm still watch my old VCDs..... haha...... for the young who don't know wad on earth is a VCD, its like a CD or a DVD exccept that its roughly about 800MB in size so the movie comes in 2 parts... haha.... began watch all the old movies.... so far i've watched The Thomas Crown Affair, Money Not Enough (the 1st one), The Matrix, The entire Star Wars Saga...... Not bad actually..... but then the VCDs come from questionable sources, if you know wad i mean.... haha.... so the sound and picture quality really sucks.... might as well stream it from movie6.net.... haha.....

Silver

Oh well.... even though i'm on MC, i'm kinda worried wads going on in office..... i'm very afraid to return to office and find a huge bomb there waiting to explode.... haha.... :) oh well.... just gotta wait and see..... oh ya.... btw, 99 DAYS to ORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sparrows

Anyway, don't know if you guys know this, but i've gone back to my bowling passion again... haha.... here's my two new balls that i bought.... looks quite cool eh.... looking to invest in one more tho.... but then lacking the $$$$..... haha.... any kind sponors out there.... kind enough to sponsor a Singaporean talent???? haha..... jk jk jk...... :) i'm quite lousy actually.... the dream? qualify for NTU Bowling Team by 2009..... but i heard the cut off is an average of 170, and that is already super heng if you can enter with that results, but my current average is only 140-150.... man.... needs alota practice man..... :)

Hey f..... dunno if you would read this.... :) thanks for taking my nonsense f...... may HE end up with you and not someone else....... :)

This is the mid-performance reactive ball...
Storm Street Rod.... Cost me $270

This is my plastic ball....
ABS Gold Spinner..... Cost me $200

I wanna buy this ball... High performance reactive.......
Hammer Black Widow Venom..... It will cost me at least $350

Yoz.....

2008-09-08T19:47:00.018+08:00

Haha..... its been so long since i last posted anything on my blog.... since i got loads of free time now and also a heart and mind full of emotions, maybe its time to let it all out.....
thanks for sticking by me and my nonsense all these years.... you helped me to grow..... :0
if you dun know wad i am really talking about and just happen to stumble onto my blog, good luck trying to decipher wadever was written.... to those who know how to "read between the lines".... haha..... keep it to yourself then..... :0
you are so young.... i feel like a p*****hile.... so i'll wait.... wait for you to come of age.... hopefully, you'll be of like mind, and feel the same way.....
you might ask, why do i have so much free time now? haha.... its cos now i'm on a 5-day MC.... sprained my ankle while in church..... haha..... i was leading worship for Powerhouse when i was doing "run run run run in the light" when i turned around and there he was, a small boy, right in my path.... like an innocent bystander in the path of Juggernaut..... IMPENDING COLLATERAL.... haha...... so i jumped out of his way, landed on my toes and *OUCH*..... sprained..... haha..... lucky Ruth was there too..... so not too bad.... at least got someone to cover while i limped off slowly.... :D
to some ppl..... : no matter how much i like you, i know i can never be together with you..... but i dun wan to soil our friendship with this lousy confession of love..... so in my own perverse way like this, let me tell you that i like you alot, but i can't bear to soil wad we already have... rest assured, i will make sure it won't ever disturb you in that way... i've already given it up....
but anyway, life now seems quite meaningless..... quite sad..... i dunno why..... i can be so HIGH one minute and so LOW the next... so full of confidence one day, and lower than shit the next day.... i think i have like this sadistic creature growing inside me, one that thrives on my pain and the pain of others surrounding me..... and worse, its battling the good in me..... GUESS WAD..... i have been been feeding the wrong me..... sian..... when will this end.....
yj..... i still feel like a bastard.... playing with your feelings..... please forgive me..... still allow me the pleasure of your friendship....
CMD sunday was a blast..... with the only blemish that i arrived late for the prayer meeting in the morning.... i guess puntuality is a major issue for me to conquer..... even my charges and wards like chow, seng, ryan, walt, lest, marc are all making fun of me for it..... haha.... i'm sorry..... i'm still trying.... :)
js - my best fren while growing up.... i'm sorry for letting our frenship to detoraite.... allow me a chance to once again be a fren.... not just a stranger.... but a fren.... soccer guys, sorry for psing you all..... accept my apologies....
Oh ya.... speaking of which.... All the best to all the O, A, N level ppl.... do well and score well.... esp my cell ppl.... no matter wad you score, good or bad, you are still you.... :) let no one judge you for being you..... but of course still must try your best la.... :)
ks, wy, sc, ll, rp, jt, ml..... you are and will always be my cell members.... you will always have that little portion of my heart with you all.... haha..... the ATM sessions with you all were worth it..... hopefully you dun find me too abrasive.... haha.... sc and ks esp, you guys have a really special place in my heart..... grow well and live well.... :)
Oh well.... i think i should stop blabbering.... Haha.... here is a vid i found recently.... wad can 4 guys and a camera produce???? haha..... watch and see..... enjoy..... :)
rt, gl.... thanks for befriending me all these years.... :) its been like forever.... i'm really glad to enjoy your company and not have you treat me like a side show freak....

Sigh..... this lonely feeling again..... pls ppl.... dun reject me if i call or msg....

Sigh..... Look on the bright side....

2007-12-27T21:28:00.000+08:00

Sigh....

Sorry for not blogging for this long.....

More than a month already.....

I guess I was just too lazy to bother logging in and typing this.....

Haha...... Guess what i got for a Christmas gift? I got a one day EXTRA on Christmas Day itself.... WOW!!!!! Wad a great gift...... For those who do not know, a EXTRA is a puishment that must be carried out while confined in camp..... And guess wad..... This punishment mete out upon me is not even my fault..... I just happen to be in the cross-fire..... I'm just colatteral damage..... I mean, WHAT THE HELL??? Thanks MWO *o* T**..... You have really made my Christmas a really special one....

Oh... But then on the bright side, I can hear it ringing ever so loudly..... The sound of impending freedom.... YES..... I'm talking about ORD!!!!!!! One year down.... Just one more to go..... 11 months and 3 weeks as a matter in fact.... :) I'm so looking forward to leaving the conscription of this life and on to the freedom of a civil one..... :)

Check back later then..... Enjoy...... :)
sigh.... wads this feeling again???

My Cubicle - James Blunt Beautiful parody

So Sorry...

2007-11-17T08:58:00.000+08:00

Hi its me again....

Didn't blog for a long long loooooong time..... haha close to a month already......

You know, friends are not just ppl, but gifts from heaven.....

Friends are gifts to cherish and to hold.....

So do not forget..... friends are always there......

I'm really thankful for the friends in my life..........

So here's something...... 陶喆's : 普通朋友

Enjoy.......

Sigh..... 13 more months to ORD..... Long wait......
Is it me or did someone suddenly take an interest in me??? haha....

陶喆 - 普通朋友

In the arms of an ANGEL......

2007-10-12T12:36:00.000+08:00

Hey there,

Haven't posted anything here in more than a month.....

So sorry those out there that visit regularly..... Haha.....

Sometimes I do have things to write about, but either lazy to blog, no time to blog, or cos of other external issues thats why I can't blog....

This post is another music video... The song is one that really touched me alot.....

Whose arms are you in??

When you are lonely, whose arms do you run to???

Who is your "ANGEL"????

My "ANGEL" is my best friend, the one who pulled me out of my life's wreckage.....

His name is Jesus Christ, My Best Friend, My Saviour....

He is the best thing that ever happen to me....

And provided me with peace and comfort.....

Enjoy...... :)

In view of the grand scheme of things, I guess righting the wrongs in my life is more important that finding my earthly "angel"....

Angel - Sarah McLachlan ft. Josh Groban

Sniff..... Sniff.....

2007-09-07T21:14:00.000+08:00

Watched an old MV of an old song.....

Enjoy..... Sniff..... Sniff.....

Too Teary to say much..... Sniff..... Sniff......
Haha...... I stilll feel lonely..... But living with it..... :)

Random Thoughts

2007-08-21T19:55:00.000+08:00

Hey...
I've finally thought it through...
I've been silent for awhile....
I am not ready for any relationship....
Time to speak again.....
I do not want to hurt myself nor anyone else because of my immaturity....
Today's special: My Thoughts
God should be first.... Not girls.... Gotta my priorities right....

My Thoughts
Gotta remember..... Theres always sunshine after the rain... :)

I want to sail, but my body is broken.

I want to fly, but my wings are torn.

I want to find, but I'm so lost.

Yet You still Love one so broken, torn and lost.

I want to do, but I too scared.

I want to change, but my mind is weak.

I want to lead, but I'm not strong.

Yet still, Your Love surrounds me.

Time and again You saved me.

Lifted me above my fears.

But again and again I've let You down.

I'm so sorry, so so sorry.

Refresh my life Lord, make it ever true.

Take my life Lord, may I be like you.

Walk beside me Lord, I just want to say.

I Love You, My Father.

We WON!!!! We WON!!!!

2007-08-12T21:55:00.000+08:00

WOW......

sigh.... i'm s little jaded already...

Wad can I say???

am i just a fren? a good fren? or more???

We won..... :)

should i still wait for you???

Haha..... I'll start from the beginning so all shall be rightly informed..... :)

or should i look for other pastures???

This weekend has been an eventful one.....

Its really rather hard to be "faithful" when i dunno how u feel....

The very happening upper sec cell had a cell outing at the Fuji Ice Palace skating rink at JEC.... Lots of great fun.... Fell down, but got up again.... :) Finally know how to manoeuvre a 180 degree turn on the ice.... FUN FUN FUN!!!!! Haha.... :) But my feet were quite sore after that..... Especially the sole.... OUCH!!!!! But still...... No pain no gain..... :)

sigh..... there are other fish out there to catch..... and a guy can be tempted....

Then in the evening, went to a wedding dinner..... :) My cousin got married..... Haha.... Attended the dinner at a hotel I've never heard before...... Hmmm...... Trader's Hotel..... Hmmmm....... Its at Tanglin Mall there..... Haha..... The ambiance was great.... But the food a little salty leh..... A little bit un-eatable..... Haha..... Dressed quite formal for the event.... Quite surprised that others that attended not dressed the same..... :)

wad to do...... wad to do...... sigh.......

Some pics from the dinner....

Haha....

But the best news of all ------- Was TODAY.....

The match of the season...... JG vs MG...... And guess wad??? JG WON..... :) 4-0..... :) Haha...... We won we won we won........... :) YAY!!!!!! The Scorers were Kang, Macus Lim, Samuel Chow and YOURS TRULY....... Wow..... I really didn't realised I could score in this big match...... Its an amazing feeling to be there.... :) Kudos to Team JG United FC...... Cheers to more victories and more glory..... GO TEAM!!!! GO TEAM JG!!!!!!!!

I've Done It.... I'm Doing It.... I'm Gonna Do It....

2007-08-06T14:52:00.000+08:00

Whew.....

Its another week again.....

Haha..... This time its much better i guess...... Haha.....

I finally got this week going on the right foot.... Haha.....

But quite sad.... Cos on sunday we, the JG FC, played our last game of the season.... But we lost 4-0.... Hmmm...... And to think i fluffed a perfectly open shot near the 90th minute at point blank range...... Hmmm...... Life's like that I guess.... Haha..... Anyway..... Its time to learn from this and move on to improve to be better..... Haha.... Gotta start training for the JG vs MG match on the 12th Aug at 5pm @ Serangoon Stadium..... Gotta at least score a goal..... Must score at least one..... Let the world see the POWER OF JOHN NG!!!!!!!!!! MUAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! Just kidding la..... I'm quite lousy actually.... :)

Haha.... Just got a NEW TOY on Saturday..... But not considered a toy cos every time I use it I gotta pay $$$$...... Haha..... Some people know what I'm toking about..... But for the rest..... Haha..... Its a for me to know, for you to find out basis..... :)

Wow..... Interesting..... Haha..... The last time i actually danced seriously was in Sec 1, where my school had a National Day Celebration Dance Competition..... Haha.... I remember I was in Sec 1G and we were paired up with a very good dance class seniors of Sec 3C..... We rock...... We won FIRST PLACE & $200!!!!!! Haha.... Those were the days..... Actually, I really enjoy dancing..... Haha.... Good way to lose weight too... :)

Anyway, I finally decided to "take up"dancing too..... Haha.... Not go to classes or anything..... But learning from what I see on TV.... Try to copy all that dance moves and do it..... Haha.... Perfecting it would actually make me sweat like a pig.... Haha... Like now.... Sweating like crazy cos finally perfected about 50% of the dance steps for the HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL song "We're all in this together"...... Haha..... Seems like a haven't lost my touch..... :) Hee hee.... A bit the buay baa.... But what to do, its my blog ma.... Hee hee.....

Ok.... Sayonara..... Cya.... Next time.... :)

Feel better already.... Guess its cos i really went to exercise by dancing my sorrows away... Haha... But that lonely feeling still plagues my mind... Eating away at my being....

Pits.... Down in the Pits.....

2007-08-04T22:24:00.000+08:00

Hmmm......

Its me again.....

This week quite weird......

Dunno why the whole week very depressed.....

Still, I shall pen down some thoughts.......

DEPRESSED RUMBLINGS

Sadly my life is not as I hoped,

But I know that lies are such that

My dreams won't seem to come true.

Down comes the rain and wind,

I want to be swept off

By the torrid waters of the soul.

By someone who can

Know how to survive.

Connect at a deeper level,

At 5 on Saturdays too.

Where our souls unite

And ignite in flames.

Through the quiet pleas

And other peas.

Of our very own song,

Where I know I belong.

Songs, the expression of one's soul,

May it be bestowed to one so bold.

I dream it could happen to me,

Somewhere over the rainbow,

Where I would be breaking free,

Away from worldly cares.

The start of something new,

And out with the old.

Would be what I've been looking for,

Is to know and be all I want to be.

Is this too much to ask,

Too much hassle?

If I wanna Break Free???

Sigh.... I can only share this way.... Read odd numbered lines for true meaning...

Touching...... Touching......

2007-07-31T21:19:00.000+08:00

Sob..... Sob..... Great movie...... GREAT MOVIE...... :)

I just watched high school musical again on tv last sunday..... so touching.......
haha..... I guess I'm over sensitive la..... But then again, to be swept off your feet by a stranger whom you feel such a great connection to, through songs, expressions of the soul, isn't that wonderful???

For some reason, this movie touched me deeply..... Haha..... I find it very endearing and heart-warming...... Soulful and refreshing...... Haha..... Call me sentimental... Haha.... A SNAG (Sensitive New Age Guy).... Haha..... I really have not seen a movie quite like this in a long while......
Sigh...... Why Why Why...... Why is it not going to happen in real life.....
A must watch....... MUST WATCH........ Enjoy...... :)
How i wish this could happen to me..... Sadly, it is only a fantasy...... It can't be real.......

I'm Back......

2007-07-19T17:07:00.000+08:00

Yo Ppl.....

Its been awhile., I'm sorry if I was gone too long.... Haha.... I was busy the whole month of June, going on mission trip to Thailand and helping out in my church's June Children Camp for ages 6-12.... Haha..... I can now finally find the time to blog cos i'm on 5 DAYS MC!!!!!!

Yup..... Cos I just went for an operation on my left ear to solve a problem called a pre-arricular sinus (I think I got the spelling right)...... Now resting at home.... :)

Pic on left is pic of my stitches...

Anyway, who those who haven't gone for a mission trip before, here's my reflections for the trip..... Hope you can draw inspriation and go for one as well..... :)

Reflections

Embarking on this mission trip, with 4 prior mission trip experiences of which 3 are to the same area, same people, and same way of life. At the airport, I began to really really ask myself, why go again? I felt like I’ve done it all, seen it all, what else have I done or yet to do? But God surprised me yet again.

now i'm confused

Prior to this trip, I remember feeling really down, close to depressed. I can’t really remember why that was so, but I felt really bad, as if whatever I did does not hold any meaning or purpose anymore. Hence my somewhat nonchalant attitude before the trip. I told myself, maybe this trip I’ll just take a back seat and do observations. But little did I know that God has something totally different in store.

i do not know if u are really interested

Upon reaching Thailand, as usual the simple life, the mountains and the vegetation and raw undergrowth is a breath of fresh air apart from the mundane concrete jungle of Singapore. As we travel up the mountains on the back of the 4WD truck, what amazed me most was the fresh air and the very beautiful scenery that passed before our eyes. The phrase that kept lingering in my mind was that of a line in the song "Sanctuary", it goes "to think that the universe could not withhold your glory, yet you chose to live in me, I’m so amazed." This realisation was the wake-up call that snapped me out of my "depression". Hence, surprise number 1.

are u playing me?

As the days progressed, I am again struck by the earnestness of the people wanting to worship God, that they would choose to travel on foot to climb up a mountain in the night, with minimal light and raining cats and dogs, just to hear God’s word. At that point, I really wondered if Singaporeans are too comfortable and pampered. That was the night, that I preached for the first time in my life, a message on healing, though I made a few errors in my message, Pastor Jonathan and the team said it was okay, just need to brush up on my content. Hopefully I won’t make the same mistakes again. Surprise number 2.

or are you for real??

Surprise number three is not something new. In fact, it has been with me for a very long time, just that I finally realised it on the trip. When a group of twelve people are placed together for 5-6 days, it would be a difficulty to bear with each other and forgive one another’s idiosyncrasies. Hence on the last day of the trip, I realised that I’ve got friends that I know will be by my side, faithful friends that would not dissolve with the wind. And for that I’m thankful. Friends are really a gift from above, to cherish and to love.

please let me know......

In conclusion, I really thank God for this trip. I went from a nonchalant attitude of not knowing what else is there for me to learn from the mission trip, to having three pleasant surprises from God.

Bored??? Need a read??? Try this.....

2007-06-05T09:22:00.001+08:00

Hey there.... its me again..... haha.....

am i really that infatuated with you???

Not too long ago, i read two books..... fantasy books...... haha part 1 and part 2 of the inheritance trilogy..... written by a great author called Christopher Paolini..... Great author whose writing style resembles the late J.R.R. Tolkien..... haha....... its a great read..... i was captivated for hours on end..... didn't want to put down the book at all..... :) its been a long time since a book captivated me this much.....

its the second night in a row that i dreamt of us being together.....

introducing, part1 of inheritance trilogy:introducing, part2 of inheritance trilogy:

wad is wrong with me???

In closing..... let me assure you.... these are really great reads....... haha....... still waiting for the third book to be finished........ haha...... until next time, take care....... I'll be back with flashes of inspiration the next time round..... :)

NTC..... Not as easy as you think!!!!!

2007-06-04T14:29:00.000+08:00

yo yo yo..... its me again.... the one and only.... =)

again, no flashes of inspiration, but just regular updates of my life for any out there interested.... haha..... though i know not many ppl would care about a nobody like moi..... haha.....

just a small background knowledge..... NTC stands for Neighbourhood Tuition Centre, a free non-profit organization that my church organises every wed night for those underprivileged children.... the teachers are not hired and are volunteers, like moi... haha..... i first started teaching there in 2005, while i was waiting for the O'level results to come out.... haha...... didn't go to MI for the first three months cos i thought that it was quite useless.... haha.... but then i qualified for JJC, and so time does not permit me to hav the liberty to teach there anymore....

but, recently, ever since i enlisted, knowing full well that my job in the army would be a desk job, i pledged my commitment once again.... haha... this time, i would be teaching the pri6, together with Serlene Tan (oops... hope i didn't spell wrong.... if i did pls forgive me....) haha.... anyway.... if anyone of y0u out there ever think it would be an easy job trying to teach those "little terrors", you are sorely mistaken.....

not only must you deal with the pace of the class or the work of the students, u would also need to deal with class cohesion..... the WORST thing is that my class of 6 ppl, consists of 1 boy and 5 girls..... that is BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD news for a guy teacher like me...... haha.... for those bio twits out there who do not know, puberty for girls start at the tender age of 12..... Therefore, 12=pri6..... OOPS...... suddenly my job scope increased..... now i gotta be on my toes to prevent any unwanted infatuations..... there is this one girl who is from the other pri6 class and keep wanting to come over to my class..... OH NO..... BAD BAD BAD sign..... haha..... thank God i was well prepared and know how to deal with it..... haha......

but at the end of the day, i still like teaching there..... it is indeed an enriching experience.... =) Thank God for NTC and the good work of all the volunteer teachers there that made a difference in many young children's lives....

am i mature enough to handle a steady relationship??? am i compatible with you??? i dunno.... i really dunno..... GOD, PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!

Acceptance??? Future???

2007-06-03T21:21:00.000+08:00

Yo.... yo.... yo.....
Haha, no flashes of inspiration this time.... just a simple update on my life.... I just accepted my uni course of CHEMISTRY & BIOLOGICAL CHEMISTRY at the university on the western side of the island known as NTU... Haha.... That will mean that my second home will be at Jurong for a total of 9 Years.... Wow.... I spent 10 years at Dover Road area (Pri,Sec), 9 years at Jurong (JC,Army,Uni)... Incredible....

I'll be trying to read a major in Chemistry and a minor in Mathematics.... Haha.... all in a bid to pursue my dream of becoming a TEACHER.... Haha.... Still waiting for the reply from MOE though.... It will definitely be great to get that teaching award..... Well..... Dun wanna think about it now.... Haha.... My second interview didn't go too well.... But then again, no use fretting about it now.... Let nature take its course.... All I can do is to pray and hope that God will make a way....

All that is confirmed at this stage is just to suffer out the rest of my 1 years 6 months of my "jail-term".... Haha... And, really hope that i dun go to DB otherwise my hopes all come crashing down.... Gotta stay on my toes till the date that I ORD LOH!!!! :)

Sigh.... I'm interested in you, but are you interested in me??? You gotta gimme a sign...

Just to see you smile

2007-06-02T00:39:00.000+08:00

This blog of mine only has a sole purpose... whenever inspiration hits me, I'll jot it down and post it here... hahahaha.... this particular piece came to me while i was on duty in "prison".... 24hrs of sheer torture, one that I'll won't even wish on my worst enemy..... hahahaha...... inspired by a Keith Urban(Nicole Kidman's new husband for those turtles out there who still dunno) song....

Just to see you smile

Seeing you smile means the world to me
Lips curled in pleasant joy
Warms my heart, hairs stand on ends
My whole body tingles with delight
Just because u smiled

It's hard to say I'm sorry for how I've hurt you so
I've never wanna see you cry this way
For i believe tears should be shed for joy
Not for such sorrow and pain
I'm so sorry, let me try to right the wrongs

The world in exchange for that sweet smile
That once radiated from your face
To hell with my pride, to hell with my pain
Let them all fall like rain from my eyes
As i try to make the sorrow fade

I regret not treasuring having you by my side
For just to see you smile again, only from a distance
"So near and yet so far", how true how true
Denying myself from you
Is the hardest thing I'll ever do

I'll be your guardian angel
Keeping you safe and free
keeping virgil day and night
Till the sun loses its light
I'll do all that, Just to see you smile

How???? Wad do you all think???
Can???? More coming along.... Stay tuned.....

i wonder, will we ever be like this???

Simple Intro

2007-06-01T22:02:00.000+08:00

Yo... Welcome to my blog.... First of its kind...... :) Be prepared for more and more of me..... :)

Be talking to ya soon......

Yupz..... The super duper hansome guy in the pic is none other than yours truly..... :)